Saturday, July 4, 2015

• Anaphylactic Shock & My Best Friend •

I take him for granted sometimes.
I fight with him & scream at him. 
But 110% of the time I love him so much & I am so glad I married him. 

You know how they always talk about those forks in your road, one bad, one good! Yeah I've experienced that major fork in the road. Marry someone who has a baby boy... Or leave him, someone who loves me unconditionally??

I chose that first one & I don't know what I ever could have done without him. He has done so much for me, for our boys, for everyone around him. He will be the first one to help in time of need! 

I needed him last night. I was 20 minutes into my workout & I started to experience what I now know is a severe allergic reaction. To what? I have no idea. I laid on my yoga mat, that I've been on a million times, & 10 minutes later, my hands itched, my feet itched, I was getting upset with my kids. I was turning into one crazy, scared, & panicked mama. I had no idea what was going on until I broke out & my sister talked me into going to the emergency room ( after Trev had tried so hard to get me to go. ) He of course sped, but got me to the hospital as quick & safe as he could. I was scared, serious panic attack mode. The nurse confirmed anaphylactic shock... It sounds so scary.


Friday, July 3, 2015

• A Mothers Love •

My husband showed me this video of Marc Mero & his mothers love! I cried my eyes out! It was absolutely heartbreaking to hear how much he had put his mom through & yet amazing because of the love she had for him, she never gave up on him! Do you have anyone like that in your life, even though you have messed up multiple times? 

I remember bits and pieces of high school really well. There are lots of memories with my dance team & then there is one distinct memory with my mom. I battled an undiagnosed eating disorder for most of JH/HS. My mom & dad found out because of a girl at school snitching on me, while I was puking after lunch. I wasn't very sneaky in JH!  I learned a little better (or so I thought) & gave up the bulimia & took on anorexia. It was much quieter & a lot more easy to hide. My mom soon found out, but by that point I was deep in it & around 100 lbs. I felt good. I was still dancing at my top potential & excelling in school! I wasn't hurting anyone, according to my me. My mom knew I was dying inside. She never once "punished" me because of it. She knew that wasn't going to do any good. She was my biggest supporter. I was confident in telling her how I felt. She did lots of research where to send me for therapy. Living in a small town & a dad who was a farmer, we didn't have the money to go somewhere like that. I felt like I wasn't that severe of a case to go to rehab. So I sought out my school counselor & she definitely helped me get through high school! My mom never gave up on me. She has helped through some of my toughest moments as a wife & as a mom. She will always be there for me & never look down on me. I love her so much! 

Wednesday, July 1, 2015

• Everything Happens For A Reason •

Welcome to the first of my 30 posts of July! I had the opportunity to connect with lots of other bloggers, one specific who set the group up, and I'm so excited to get back on the blog train! I've missed it. 

So I'd like to give an introduction first, I've had a lot of new followers on my Facebook page! My name is Kylie Mecham. I'm married to the love of my life, he gives me so much love! I also am a mama & step mama to 4 little boys! My youngest was born with a rare genetic disorder that caused him to be born with diabetes, it's now gone but will be back later in life. He spent 73 days in SLC, UT at Primary Children's Hospital. It was the hardest trial I've been through as a mom since becoming one 5.5 years ago. I love blogging. I love fitness. I have found it makes me focus on my life a little better. I can take out my stress on fitness & I love writing about real & raw things. It makes me feel like I'm connecting with people! 

It's funny how your life changes once you become a mom. In high school I thought life was hard, it was the easiest 4 years of my life. I thought I would never become the crazy girl, or the one who couldn't lose the baby weight. I became both. I started out with just a small bout of PPD after having my first baby, but with each one it got worse. I didn't realize, and neither did anyone else, that I was having problems until a couple months after my second baby. My mood swings were uncontrollable, my relationships with my husband, kids, & others was deteriorating & I was heartbroken. I didn't know what to do or how to fix it. I finally went to the doctor & the medicine really helped. And then Peyt came along, long story short, easy pregnancy, no problems & then my repeat c-section brought a tiny 3 lb 15 oz baby boy in my life. & he was sick. Very sick. & I was right back into that PPD except this time being in a major hospital & having the monitors constantly going off I developed some PTSD to go along with it. I was a mess. We brought him home like I said after 73 days & at times I had no idea what I was doing. I just continued to spiral downhill & it was awful. I started working out after Peyt turned one & it's been my saving grace since. I have such better days when I get that fast 30 minute workout in! It's true when they say you get much happier from exercising. 

I can't help wonder what my life would have been like had I not been a hormonal wife or mom. Would my boys have a normal, happy childhood? When they get older, will they remember that year they're mom went bat shit crazy? It's a huge blessing that had family & a husband who believed & loved me enough to stick with me. Everything happens for a reason. I firmly believe you are given trials to lead you to your next road in life, good or bad. You just need to live your life according to YOU! No worrying about what everyone else thinks. 

I hope to really get this blog going with this fun challenge! I have so many ideas & so much to say...